Serving greater St. Louis, MO Appointments: 314.994.9344
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In Christianity, the term agape refers to
the unconditional and voluntary love of God, God's love for humanity, and our
call to love one another.
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Keys to stress management decision-making:
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Knowing that stress exists and can
be handled in categories
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Understanding
the value and traps of each category
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Being
honest and realistic about your limitations
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Making
sure to allow God to do His work, His way, on
His schedule; let faith rather than pace guide
you.
CATEGORIES OF STRESS:
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Needs: Decisions made from the head/
thinking, e.g. basic survival, shelter,
order, freedom, connectedness, fun,
meaningfulness, self worth
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Wants: Decisions made from the heart/
feelings, e.g. desires, wishes, dreams,
demands, expectations, etc.
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Threats: Decisions requiring the head
and heart to work together, e.g. considering
consequences, spiritual decorum, habits, health
and other barriers
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Achievements: Accomplishments of the
body based on the weight of the decisions made
by the head and the heart, e.g. budgeting,
relationships, job, school, success, inner
peace, etc.
| A
Situation is urgent.
Situation is in my control.
Sample: Paying rent vs. gambling;
consistent parenting vs. inconsistent
relationships (Make effective choices) |
B Situation is urgent.
Situation is not within my control.
Sample: Handling hospital bills with no
insurance coverage; facing crisis/ loss
(Harness inner strength, emergency resources
and new supports) |
| C
Situation is NOT urgent.
Situation is within my control.
Sample: Making good grades in school;
credible work record; limiting spending/
saving (Make the most of your God-given
talents; seize opportunities as gifts; treat
time preciously...don't waste it
complaining) |
D Situation is NOT urgent.
Situation is not within my control.
Sample: Seen and un-seen threats of life,
e.g. age, health, economy, etc. (Study to
learn God's promises to you; get training or
counseling to keep your free will desires in
sync, e.g. avoid blaming others for your
failures; get help in learning to survive
through chaos because life at its best is
not easy) |
Keys to using the grid:
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Concentrate your
efforts on A and C (needs and
achievements)
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void actions and habits
that cause situations to grow out of control
that could be better managed instead of becoming
Bs and Ds (wants and
threats), e.g. binge spending, drugs, poor
anger management, inadequate communication
skills
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Stay "prayed up", asking
God to be with you in all that you say and do,
especially in life events that truly are in the
B and D ranges
Call for an appointment to
learn how to use this grid as an option to stay
positive, rather than be ruled by fear.
3 Spiritual Stress
Management Exercises:
Outcome: practice of putting God first in all you
say and do
Outcome: practice of feeling more powerful because
God is with you in all you say and do
Outcome: practice of allowing God to nurture you in
a safe inner place that you have created
in your mind; and can go to no matter how chaotic
life might be
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| Biography: Frances J. Thomas received her degrees
from St. Louis University and EAP training
through Washington University. She is licensed
in Missouri, is a member of the National
Association of Social Workers, is credentialed
through the Academy of Certified Social Workers
and is certified to provide ACSW and licensure
supervision.
Frances provides individual and group
counseling, and has had decades of experience
with both. Specialty areas include crisis
management for grief/bereavement, life problems,
trauma or neurosis related to health, job,
personal or relationship stress, abuse,
addictions and relapse. She also focuses on
unique issues of minority and/or women through
providing personal growth coaching, career and
educational mentoring. Skilled in developing
short term program series, she can work with
church ministries or private groups concerning
special needs, e.g. life-planning issues,
spiritual stress management or grief resolution.
Her solution-focused counseling, based on the
conviction that only God controls hope,
empowers clients to believe that they can take
charge of their lives even when reality seems
impossible to endure. She blends reality therapy
and cognitive behavior education so that clients
grow strength from within, in-spite of pressures
in their outside world.
** We are proud
to announce Frances Thomas' article "The Awesome
Power of Optimism: A Personal Journey to
HOPE" has been published in the book Overcomers, Inc.: True Stories of Hope,
Courage and Inspiration, complied by
Lynne Klippel. The article speaks
specifically about overcoming personal
medical and socio-cultural challenges
through hard work, and about spiritual
empowerment. Frances' own struggles
and accomplishments drive her to believe
that as long as there is a God, optimism
rules. Her counseling style presumes
that in spite of disease or circumstances,
some degree of abundant living is possible.
Please contact Frances via Agape or visit
Overcomers, Inc if you would like to
purchase the book.
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